I've Lost Half the Year and Half of My Mind (Duh Duh Duuuuuh...)

Whoa. Remember way back in January when I said I was taking time off from blogging but I'd still check in every once in a while with updates, thoughts, etc. Yeah, now it's...August. How did that happen? Where did this year go? All these questions are making me feel stoned.

Anyway, I caught a commercial the other day for Bonnie Hunt's upcoming talk show, shockingly titled "The Bonnie Hunt Show." How much do I love her? This is a perfect idea as Hunt is as funny, sarcastic and down-to-earth as when she's talking to David Letterman or little kids. Who knows how long this show will last but just seeing this commercial made me start compiling a list of other things I'm excited about right now. Other things such as:

- The new music video for "Warcwick Ave." by Duffy, a beautiful song sung by a new, up and coming singer with a great voice. The video is so simple and so touching in its lack of polish. It's light years above the generic singing-to-a-crowd video for her first single, the great "Mercy," so hopefully her record company realizes Duffy deserves a little something more.

- Out magazine's article, "Has Manhunt Destroyed Gay Culture?" In exploring not only why Manhunt.com, the most popular gay male website for, uh, "connecting," has gotten so popular, but what it has taken away from gay culture, writer Michael Joseph Gross has written a surprisingly compelling argument for logging off instead of getting off. Even more, the news that one of Manhunt's founders, Jonathan Crutchley, has donated thousands of dollars to anti-gay Republican presidential nominee John McCain has ignited such fury from Manhunt's subscribers that he's been forced to resign as Chairman. Granted, he'll still be raking in millions and probably still donate it to McCain, but in this age of Web 2.0, it's an inspiring reminder for writers like myself of the power of print journalism.

- The fact that "Project Runway" has finally gotten better. Season 5 has seriously been lacking with the challenges (recycling the grocery store challenge was fine, but then recycling the take-a-photo-in-NY-and-use-as-inspiration challenge? That wasn't even very exciting the first time!) and with talent (no one has really stepped out as a consistent bad-ass designer the way Kara Saun or Michael Knight did in their respective seasons). But when they had to design a day-and-night business outfit for Brooke Shields to wear on her nighttime drama "Lipstick Jungle," the results were exactly as they should be. The top 2 contenders were surprisingly great and the bottom two were heinous and laughable. The best of both worlds!

- Pineapple salsa. It's sitting in my fridge, right now, waiting to be piled on top of grilled jerk chicken for dinner tonight. Just sitting there, with its cucumber and mint and lime, calling my name, whispering, "Donny...Donny, you know you want to eat me...come on...there's plenty extra...I'm so sweet and crunchy...Just scoop me up in a spoon and eat me. Spoon me, Donny, spooooon meeeee." Ok, that just got weird. But whatevs. Between that and the quarter of a watermelon that I ate by myself a few weeks ago and the margarita that I had with ravioli - yes, ravioli! - when the in-laws visited, I'm loving summertime food. I just need some grilled corn and I'll be all set. I wonder if pineapple salsa tastes good on ravioli?

- Jamie Lidell. Love him. If you haven't heard of him, watch this. Or this. Or just go buy his albums Multiply and Jim because his brand of neo-soul pop is infectious.

- St. Joseph, MI. I'm heading there for 10 days in September. Not only is the train ride under two hours and a fraction of the cost of a plane ticket to anywhere, I found a great deal at a nice hotel that's downtown and right by the beach. It's close, it's cheap, it's beautiful, and my sweetie will be joining me for the second weekend for our first and only vacation this whole year. Thank you, staycation!



I'm sure there's more but that's what's occupying my time right now. Summer's almost done so I'm just hoping to make the most of it. And hopefully it won't be summer 2009 before I blog again, but knowing me, that's not out of the question.

Top Project Runway Rip-Off

With Top Chef, Top Design and last night's debut of Shear Genius, it seems that Bravo is committed to landscaping their entire schedule with the creative-arts-reality-contest "brand" they created with Project Runway. Take twelve campy, dramatic creative people, stuff them in a pressure cooker situation with multiple challenges per episode and then offer them up to awkward hosts and bitchy judges. The diminished returns are obvious. As evidence of how much Bravo has diluted their own brand: Heidi Klum begat Padma Lakshmi who begat Todd Oldham who begat...Jaclyn Smith?

The differences become especially obvious during the best part of each show - the judging process. Top Design is as much about a visual art form as PR. Sure, you might not get to walk in the space and really analyze the details, but for the most part you're experiencing what the judges experience. The vital difference from PR's judging process, however, is that rooms don't move. Those ugly, cavernous booths the contestants paint windows on just sit there. Each designer awkwardly stands at the entrance while the judges silently walk around their creation before moving on to the next one. The whole process is strangely quiet and restrained.

At first I was underwhelmed by TD. Even after a couple episodes, not one contestant had produced a room provoking a response beyond "eh, it's fine." Luckily, Bravo snagged at least 6 genuinely talented designers that began to produce much work as the show went on. And I was happy to see the sophisticated Matt walk away with the contest. He was always professional and produced consistently chic rooms.

(As a side note, since the show is called Top Design and not Top Designer, shouldn't that mean Matt's collection of chairs and sofas walk away with the prize money? And when did Todd Oldham get so orange and sing-songy? He's like a flirty carrot. Even with his exhaustive quick fixes for the contestants, he was much more charming on his own HGTV show.)

What frustrates me about Top Chef is that you can't participate in the judging process the way you can with PR. You hear about the ingredients the contestants are throwing together, you watch them sweat over a stove with a blow torch or massive chef's knife, and you can admire, or mock, the presentation. But you can't actually taste the final product. You have to take the judges' word on whether or not they achieve culinary perfection.

As for Shear Genius...well, let's just say that so far, the best part about it is that it's theme song is nowhere nearly as ear-bleedingly bad as Top Design's. It's as if the composer of TD's wants everyone to hate music as much as they do.

It's not the other show's fault. They just don't fit the medium of television contests the way PR does. Dinner plates and 12'x12' rooms aren't revealed by sexy models hopping and spinning and baring ass. I'm not saying they should, but it would be fun to see a starving model hungrily salivating over the hunk of beef she's parading around, and I don't just mean tall, scruffy TC contestant Sam Talbot (pictured above right). And I have a feeling SG's models might regret appearing on the show once they realize they have to stand around with treasure chest "hair art" on their heads.

Whether it's a plate of dehydrated veal cheeks, plywood walls smothered in Tuscan Sunrise paint, or a mannequin head sporting yet another set of asymetrical bangs, not one of these shows produces the same kinetic sexiness of PR's runway shows. And considering PR just started auditions for Season Four, it's going to be a while before the original returns.

(Thanks to Chicagoist and New York for the pics.)

Also check out: Pack Your Breasts and Leave.
And: Project Runway Sashays Into My Heart.
And: Todd Oldham: Everyone's New Best Friend.

Please Pack Your Breasts and Leave

Wow. A Bravo reality show is actually getting rid of its robotic, flat-voiced hostess in favor of someone with actual television experience.

No, it's not Heidi Klum, who has actually gotten more comfortable killing the dreams of amateur fashion designers on the addictive Project Runway (it helps that she's, you know, one of the producers).

Instead, it's little Katie Lee Joel, Billy Joel's 12-I-mean-25-year-old host of the first season of Top Chef, a reality show from PR's producers about chefs battling to be...well, I guess the title is fairly Snakes On a Plane-esque in its self-explanation.

Maybe "robotic" is a tad harsh. Let's just go with "telegenically-challenged." But while Katie Lee apparently does have some background in food (Bravo never really explained what they meant when they described her as a "food writer" - I just assumed she knew how to write a grocery list), she couldn't, um, talk about food very comfortably. In fact, she couldn't do anything comfortably in front of the cameras, always dropping anchor-like duds of non-wisdom while judges Tom Colicchio and Gail Simmons could actually chew and think at the same time.

Instead, Bravo has made a ridiculously great decision in hiring Padma Lakshmi. A drop-dead gorgeous Indian woman (she makes Catherine Zeta-Jones look like butt) who has cooking and television experience (she hosted a much-missed show on the Food Network), Lakshi has been out of the public eye for quite some time. Oh, she also happens to be married to Salman Rushdie.

Top Chef is still seriously flawed. Unlike PR, where all you have to do is look at the final designs to judge them, on TC you can only look at the food the contestants prepare, and while presentation counts, you still have no idea how good the food actually is until the judges tell you. And the prizes aren't all that thrilling. I think they get a stove and, like, a magazine article or something.

But with Padma to guide us with her seductively intellectual presence (who will hopefully have a better signature send-off then "pack your knives and leave"), TC's second season could be approaching PR's crack-like addiction.

Also check out: Hooray for Jay.
And: Obsessing Over Food I Never Eat, with Giada de Laurentiis.

I'm So Excited...And I Just Can't Hide It...

Wednesday, July 12th, people!



But in case you can't wait that long until the Season 3 premiere of Project Runway, here are a few stories to hold you over:

The Boston Herald has an interview with host Heidi Klum on what to expect for the new season. I love when she says, "Our show is not about grinding up worms and eating them or seeing how long they can last doing some crazy stunt." Boo-ya! Take that, Fear Factor! Also, did you know Heidi hosts the German version of America's Next Top Model?

The L.A. Times has a "Life after PR" article, including a "Where are They Now?" slide show that features strangely innacurate facts about the show but is interesting nonetheless.

Over at MSNBC, Andy Denhart, who writes for reality blurred, wonders if Bravo is pushing too much of a good thing by giving us a new season so quickly after season 2 ended.

On the blog front, for all the latest PR news, there's the exhaustive Blogging Project Runway, which takes their love of the show and spreads it to every nook and cranny of this country. If you're looking for something a little more subversive, then head over to FourFour every week for Rich's hilarious, un-equalled re-caps. You can see what I mean by pouring through his Season 2 archives here. And, if you're so inclined, you can check out my own article about the show here.

Finally, the Chicago Tribune has a great, dishy interview with PR mentor Tim Gunn. It's kind of long but worth the time. He's so professional on the show - who knew he could be such a gossip queen? Not only does he trash Season 2 champ Chloe's winning collection, he had this to say about Season 2 runner-up and fan favorite Dan: "My darling little Dan has become a terrible diva. And it’s really unattractive. … He’s been offered several jobs. He’s turned down everything. They’re not good enough for him.” Ouch. Of course, by passing up Michael Kors' job offer, Dan has time for his own blog.

Hopefully, this can satisfy any PR fix you might have until the new season begins. Make it work!

Hooray for Jay

(Blogger Update: This piece was chosen as an Editor's Pick of the Week Feb. 22-28 at Blogcritics. I'm honored!)


How come someone as funny, unpredictable and uninhibited as Jay McCarroll only gets a one-hour special while the zombie humanoid clones of The Bachelor get hours and hours of airtime? Why does the incoherent train wreck that is Flavor Flav get an entire season of Flavor of Love while the wisecracking, creative McCarroll barely gets one episode?

McCarroll, the winner of the first season of Project Runway, is the subject of Bravo's Project Jay. The cameras follow this country boy from a small, rural town in Pennsylvania as he deals with fame, moving to New York City, and putting together his first professional collection.

Unfortunately, as he puts it, he's broke. It doesn't help that he turned down Runway's $100,000 prize money in hopes of signing an exclusive licensing deal with an undetermined company.

But who needs money when you're so full of witty one-liners? On watching himself on TV: "I have the world's smallest mouth. No wonder why I can't get laid, because they're like 'that mouth is so small.'"

On his financial woes: "I just pray that I get money from somewhere even if I have to, like, sell my sperm...or hook."

On his self-image: "If I was born hot: a) I would've been dead of AIDS by now. And b) I would've just been so dumb, like those dumb hot people I'm so jealous of. Why am I so jealous of them?"

It's too bad he doesn't get more airtime because he always seems to have a lot going on in his life. Much of the episode is Jay scrambling to finish an Emmy dress requested by Runway's host, Heidi Klum, only to have her reject it at the last minute. Plus, a nagging back problem results in full-out surgery. Thankfully, there's also time devoted to his creative process, where we learn how a friend's mix tape can influence a whole collection or how he can spend six straight hours designing without even getting up to pee. As he puts it, "If you have passion, you should probably take advantage of it."

The show also slyly reveals the incestuous nature of reality TV, as Jay gets his haircut from one of the stylists on Bravo's own Blow Out and runs into previous Runway contestants Austin Scarlett, Kara Saun and - gasp! - Wendy Pepper (season one's scheming villain).

I've been a fan of both seasons of Project Runway, and I've always admired Jay's work (including his Runway Fashion Week collection, examples of which are pictured here). It's colorful, funky and sometimes even glamorous, all from a rebellious outsider's point of view. I understand how he's a controversial figure, as he tends to bitch about things that don't go his way. But most of the time, he's a funny, talented, even charming guy.

Plus, how can you not root for someone who can be self-depracating, sarcastic, and arrogant all in one delicious sound bite such as "physically, I hate myself. Mentally, I'm gorgeous"?

Project Runway Sashays Into My Heart

Tonight, December 7, 2005, the second season of Project Runway debuted. Now, I am truly happy.

In case any of you don't know, the show's first season became a ratings hit for the Bravo network (which was airing Manhunt and Queer Eye at the time and was/is the gayest network ever. Take that, Logo). Executive produced and hosted by Heidi Klum (now Klum Seal after marrying...Seal), the show pitted twelve designers against each other, giving them outrageous challenges each week. The first week they had twelve hours to make sexy evening gowns made exclusively with materials found at a grocery store (a corn husk dress won, but the lawn chair-and-placemat dress was a close second). Another week they had five hours to make swimsuits that could also be worn to a cocktail party (because, as we all have done ourselves, so many people climb out of a pool, jump in their car, and head on over to a swanky cocktail party). One designer was eliminated each week, and the final three got to show a collection at New York Fashion Week. Funny man Jay McCarroll was finally chosen as the winner.

Now it's back and literally bigger than before. The first hour they had sixteen designers, which is way too many for even the most devoted viewer to keep track of. Luckily, two of them were cut at the end of the first, ho-hum challenge (they had a week before arriving in New York to design a dress that reflected them as a designer...yawn). Arrogant Santino ("I have a hard time making something that's mediocre") was crowned the winner with his green baby-doll dress pictured on the right, although my favorite was Nick's cinnamon suit pictured below.



As the fourteen remaining designers assembled at a party, they were told that the second challenge was to create an entire outfit with only the clothes they were wearing. Well, you can just imagine the horror. Asking a designer to cut up their favorite leather jacket is like asking Courtney Love to give up insanity. This time cute little Chloe won with a simple (I would say too simple) clean blue and black dress with pockets (a nice touch).

While the robotic Klum gets to be host (thankfully she only appears at the beginning and end of each episode), she also judges the creations with designer Michael Kors (fair yet sometimes bitchy with great one-liners: "It's a little too Garanimals for me") and the fashion director at Elle magazine, Nina Garcia (much harsher yet will also lavish praise when deserved). Each week they usually have a guest judge as well, like tonight's "legendary" Diane Von Furstenburg.

Although it's still early to really know the contestants, we already had one nervous breakdown courtesy of Andre, who started bawling and yelling at the ceiling when asked to defend his shredded denim dress (apparently it represented something symbolic to him...although no one could understand what the hell he was talking about). And vapid L.A. designer Daniel Franco is back after having been the first contestant eliminated from season one. But Mr. "Follow Your Bliss" is said to have had one of the strongest showings at season two's auditions, so therefore his presence isn't some kind of gimmick.

With teasers of the upcoming season complete with tears, fighting and some crazy-ass dresses, hopefully the editors will remember that, no matter what crazy/bitchy/funny things the designers say or do, it's focusing on the creative process that sets this show apart from the Survivors and Fear Factors. The viewers don't cheer for or against people - with last season's villainous Wendy Pepper as the exception - they cheer for or against the dresses. Rating works of art or laughing at gaudy pieces of crap is the truly fun part.

I don't read fashion magazines or follow the latest trends or even watch reality TV shows, but Project Runway has me hooked. I don't have the new Project Runway magazine and I might not go so far as to post on Bravo's message board - I swear I don't do that - but I will be tuning in every Wednesday night with scorecard in hand.